How to Actually Nap When Baby Naps
“Sleep when baby sleeps,” is among the most common bits of parenting advice, but it is far easier said than done!
So here are my pointers for how to actually nap while your baby naps...
1. Stop everything and go take a nap.
Even if you have a flooded email inbox, a sink of dirty dishes, and a mountain of laundry, it can all wait. Just abandon it all then and there and retire to your bedroom to rest.
I had a really hard time with this “screw it” attitude: How can I rest knowing I’ll need to wake up and clean?! Moreover, I felt guilty and compelled to entertain and mentally stimulate Lee every moment he was awake, so I couldn’t step away from him and fold laundry! He needs me to do Tummy Time!
The truth is that a lot of those household chores can be done with your little one nearby; simply set up a safe space for your baby to explore in a large pack-and-play or cordoned off part of the room. According to Magda Gerber, founder of the Resource for Infant Educarers (RIE), you do not need to be in your baby’s face every waking moment, “If a child could have a pleasant place to play, where he could move around on his own,… and, in turn, freeing his mother to do her own work, both the other’s needs and the child’s needs could be met… No infant needs constant attention; what he needs is to feel secure.”
So, as soon as your little one is down, go lay down, too!
2. Do not open Instagram!
I know: It’s my favorite mind-melting pastime, too. But once you start scrolling Instagram, I can guarantee you that you will fall down a rabbit hole and blow all of nap time.
3. Set a white noise machine for yourself.
When Lee was a newborn, I don’t know if I ever truly slept; I would lay awake at all hours straining to hear him breathe, whine, or cry. We then got a second white noise machine for our bedroom; it helped me tune out the typical sleep sounds Lee would make (the sounds of him rolling over or the little cries as he settled) but allowed me to hear the real, “I’m AWAKE!!” cries. Without those typical baby sleep sounds jolting me awake, I was able to sleep more deeply.
4. Consider learning meditation.
Lee was a horrible napper from the ages of 4-6 months and would only nap for 30 minutes at a time, so I felt an incredible amount of pressure to force myself asleep now-NOW-NOW in order to maximize the limited nap time. The result was that I just stressed myself out obsessing about how little sleep I was getting to then ultimately not get any sleep!
If you (like me and potentially all millennials) have a hard time turning your brain off at night, practicing meditation may help you unwind and free your mind to idly think of something that isn’t your mental morning to-do list.
5. Recruit backup in case you fall into a deep sleep.
If a 20-minute power nap isn’t going to cut it for you, ask your partner, family member, or friend to be there while you nap. They can tend to the baby when the baby wakes up so you can get some extra shut-eye. Do not feel obligated to always be at-the-ready for your baby; a refreshed parent is a happy parent!
As a new parent, I definitely denied myself rest; I would wake up before Lee to shower and get his morning bottle ready and then refused to nap (because, “When else will I get this done?!”) and, of course, was up all night with a newborn. Fueled by coffee and stubborn pride, I thought I was handling it all, but I was burnt out, grouchy, and short-tempered. Learn from my mistake: Take the time you need to rest so you can come back to your baby as the parent you want to be!